One time I tried advising a good friend of mine to stop seeing this dude upon finding out that he doesn’t wear no-show socks, he actually wears none. That was when I knew I was qualified to answer some of life’s toughest quandaries. Over the past week, I’ve collected a few burning questions from fellow Monash students and have tried my best to provide insight.

Question: What is with the Harambe Memes?

I was thinking about your question on the way home, and I think you might have gotten yourself a Lea Ding exclusive on this one.

If you were one of those who were part of the [redacted] Out for Harambe bandwagon, I hope you’re able to add ‘animal activist’ onto your resume, but that’s not really the point here.

I think I’ve personally cracked the code on how memes come and go, and it’s all influenced by like, Chinese zodiacs, I think. 2016 is the year of the monkey, and Harambe, obviously symbolizes the Monkey.

Come on, think about it, the memes that have been relevant so far this year.

I mean, need I say more?

Actual footage of me arriving to #KimExposedTaylorParty, tbh.

Then there’s the recent explosion of doggo (Dog) memes that have helped me to fill up the empty, empty void in my heart. This is one meme no one should be questioning, I hope it never dies.

The next example to further solidify my conspiracy theory here is the recent Arthur’s Fist meme, representing the Rat from the series of Chinese zodiac animals. Upon researching, I did find out that Arthur is actually an aardvark, but let me live, okay?

This meme (Goat) probably predicted present day Taylor.


Question: Why am I so pretty?

First of all, how dare you.

Second of all, congratulations on overcoming your inner saboteur. I hope you still feel the same way about yourself when you accidentally open up Snapchat and it’s still on front camera mode. I’m not sure if that says more about your great sense of confidence, or my crippling self-esteem.

Maybe you were inspired by Britney, the original pretty girl. If you weren’t one of those [redacted] that slept on Britney and Iggy’s 2015 pop opus, then I’m here to preach to you about Godney’s latest work, Glory. This album is a lot to handle for Britney fans, who have previously been excited over the sound her breathing into the microphone during live shows.


Question: If you could fall in love w a tree, which and why

I’m going to go out on a limb and think that if you’re fellow Malaysian student who has been through the national examination for primary schools, or, UPSR, you might have the same answer as I do.

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The photos themselves are pretty self-explanatory. Hope this answers your question.

Love,

Ms Lea Ding

Got a burning question? Medical or spiritual quandaries? Drop them here.


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